"It could be your coming back to life album."

The other day, Shinedown's new album, Amaryllis, was available from Amazon for a mere 99 cents. Being the cheap person that I am, I jumped on that deal. Actually, I first checked how much I had in gift cards because I hate charging a buck to my debit card. I had nothing!! Panic set it, then I remembered I had some gift cards coming from Swag Bucks. I was pleased to not only find the one I was expecting, but another I had forgotten about! So yay $10. I added it to my account, purchased the album and went on my merry way.

Now, I really enjoy Shinedown. I didn't discover them until their third album. I went back through their singles and realized I liked them very much. Amaryllis, their 4th album, came out in March. I knew it was coming out, but just forgot about it. So, I gave it a listen. By the third song, I was in love. I posted on Facebook, tagging one of my Shinedown friends, about how great it was. And every song just got better and better. I listened to it non-stop for two days, foregoing my usual nighttime classical music in favor of Brent's vocals.

My love for the album led to a brief exchange between my friend and me. After gushing (again) about how much I loved the album, she said, "It could be your coming back to life album." And that's exactly what I had been thinking. Something about the album made me feel new, and really seemed to fit in with this turning point in my life. So I posted, "It's amazing how people and things come into your life exactly when you need them!!" To which, she replied, "Yes, it is. It's also amazing when you don't even realize it until later. I have been through things and had people in my life who I no longer remain in contact with, but for the time they were there the impact and significance was amazing. I look back and think about them and know a higher power placed them in my life at the exact moment I needed them, and removed them when I no longer did."


My friends are wicked smart. There have been people in my life recently who were there exactly when I needed them. Some of them, as she said, are no longer needed. At first, I was sad about the people who are no longer central to my life but I'm realizing that they were there for me when I needed them most, and that's what counts. I miss them, but every day, I'm a little more okay with it.


There are still great people in my life. I was recently introduced to Tina. She's a friend of a friend who thought we would get along fairly well. To say we get along is a massive understatement. We call each other "pea" because we're so alike, it's scary. We even sound the same. Our kids are peas, too. She's going through similar things to me. I love her. She's coming to the area in August and I cannot fucking wait to actually meet her! This goes back to people and things coming into your life when you need them. I have needed Tina. She's gotten me through some pretty emotional shit. She and Amy, my long time Internet BFF, have been my rocks throughout the separation and other side nonsense. I love them so much and I can't thank them enough for getting me through this. I have another friend, but I screwed things up and I miss her terribly. This casualty of my separation from my husband is the only thing I regret, and I wish I would have handled things differently. I hope that someday, our friendship can be restored. She's amazing, and she was there when I needed her. I still need her.


But enough with the sadz. Here's my Shinedown song, the one that really resonates with me right now.

[Verse 1:]
I remember like yesterday
You had a dream in your eyes and a smile on your face
And I'm missing those days again, yeah I'm missing those days again
And I forgot what really got in the way
Maybe the sun that wouldn't shine should be taking the blame
Cause its raining on me again, yeah its raining on me again

[Bridge:]
A paradox
The key you dropped
A manifest
For what you lost, was me
For my sake please...

[Chorus:]
Stop slowing me down, stop holding me up
Quit making a scene, enough's enough.
Let's be honest, your promise, was never meant to last
So I'm taking you on, I'm calling you out.
There's nothing left for us here now.
Let's be honest, I promise, I'm never lookin' back for my sake.
For my sake.

[Verse 2:]
Tell me something that's poetic at best
Make me believe there was a time that you weren't like the rest
And I'll never ask you again, and I'll never ask you again
For all the moments and the memories
No one could ever say we never had a history
But I'm leaving that all behind
And there is nothing gonna change my mind

[Bridge:]
A paradox
The key you dropped
A manifest
For what you lost, was me
For my sake please...

[Chorus:]
Stop slowing me down, stop holding me up
Quit making a scene, enough's enough.
Let's be honest, your promise, was never meant to last
So I'm taking you on, I'm calling you out.
There's nothing left for us here now.
Let's be honest, I promise, I'm never lookin' back for my sake.
For my sake.

[Bridge:]
A paradox
The key you dropped
A manifest
For what you lost, was me
For my sake
Please...
Stop slowing me down
Stop holding me up
Stop slowing me down
Enough's enough

[Chorus:]
Stop slowing me down, stop holding me up
Quit making a scene, enough's enough.
Let's be honest, your promise, was never meant to last
So I'm taking you on, I'm calling you out.
There's nothing left for us here now.
Let's be honest, I promise, I'm never lookin' back for my sake.
I'm never lookin' back, for my sake.
For my sake
For my sake